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The Funniest Lines From Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw - go!

Dwayne Johnson, Jason Statham & The Funniest Lines From Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw

What do you get when you put together two enemies-turned-teammates, a world-threatening virus and a whole lot of action? Great laughs, that’s what

Having watched every movie, binged every series and read every book we left on the backburner over the course of the quarantine, the folks still stuck at home have begun to revisit older favorites. In particular, it seems that for now, we no longer want to live in the world of Spanish bank heists or mullet-sporting tiger breeders or a millionaire who parachutes her way into North Korean territory. Instead, we’re rediscovering titles and tales from last year and beyond, specifically ones that reflect the widespread pandemic we now know to be our reality.

First, there was The Eyes of Darkness, a 1981 Dean Koontz novel that gained popularity for supposedly predicting the coronavirus (spoiler: it didn’t.) Then there was Severance by Ling Ma, a book from 2018 that details humankind falling prey to Shen’s Fever. Then there was the return of Contagion, in which the spread of the fictional MEV-1 virus bears eerie similarities to COVID-19. Most recently, another film has caught the public’s attention: Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw. 

Despite falling into our watchlist, Hobbs & Shaw is an obvious deviation from the rest of the virus-related content we’ve consumed over the quarantine—from the film’s plot down to its tone. A spin-off film from the Fast & Furious franchise, Hobbs & Shaw centers on its namesake characters, Luke Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) and Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham). Assigned to work together, Hobbs and Shaw learn to put aside their differences (not without struggle, we assure you) and join hands with Hattie, Deckard’s sister. The mission? To stop a cyber-enhanced villain from spreading a deadly programmable virus to the world.

Raking in $60.8 million on its opening weekend and an 88% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes, it’s clear that this installment of the growing Fast & Furious cinematic universe has earned a spot in the hearts of many—and we can only guess that besides the impressive cast and fan loyalty to the movie series—that it’s because of the hilarious dialogue that the characters exchange all throughout the film. Ahead, we shake off the quarantine blues and relive some of the funniest lines from Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw.

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When The Rock’s character tells you that, you’re gonna wanna believe it.

“You're gonna get one Samoan *ss-whooping!”

–Sefina Hobbs

And true enough, Momma Hobbs proves it!

A champagne problem is, according to the Urban Dictionary, “a problem or dilemma that, when compared to issues of poverty, national disasters and war, are not all that big of a deal, but nonetheless provide individuals with issues that must be dealt with.” And heck, we can’t find a better way to describe Shaw ourselves!

Brixton: Three shocks will kill a man.

Luke Hobbs: Here we go. It's a bad guy speech.

Hobbs & Shaw is the ninth film in this universe. By now, we all know what the textbook bad guys speech sounds like, don’t we? 

Who doesn’t love a little love-hate between crime-fighting partners, am I right?

Shaw's sister took something from me. A virus that
could wipe out half the population. And I want it back.

–Brixton Lore

In the context of today…it kind of feels like we’re peering into reality, don’t you think?

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Words Cessi Treñas

Art Matthew Fetalver

Vibe check! How does this make you feel?